welcome to asher klein dot com


Grab some refreshments and have a seat; hopefully this won’t take too long.

for $200 [weblink; via]

for $200 [weblink; via]

2 days ago
#asherkleindotcom 
chag sameach!

chag sameach!

(Source: beyonceder)

1 week ago with 115 notes

COMPUTER BUG #1: Dude, I’m trying to hack this girl’s Pinterest account to steal her recipe for spicy cheddar cornbread and get this—her password is Heartbleed.

COMPUTER BUG #2: Whoa. Twist. Let’s leave her out of this.

COMPUTER BUG #1: Def.

via

1 week ago
#heartbleed #plot twist 

FAQ for curious LA reporters

Hi. Who are you?

I’m part of the new politics team for the LA Register, focusing on tktktk

What do you think you’re doing at City Hall?

Hopefully more than Rob Ford could manage yesterday.

Where are you from?

New Yawk, by way of Chicago. 

What have you written?

I was integral in covering a big pig scandal in Seal Beach you might have heard of. Actually there’s a lot on ocregister.com. I especially enjoy long days on the ocean recovering fishing nets and talking shop with Harvey Levin. 

What do you want to write about LA?

Nice try.

What are your hopes and dreams?

Getting sent to cover the World Cup, finding and exporting LA’s greatest taco, joining the Order of the Occult Hand. (Not necessarily in that order.)

I have more questions!

aklein@ocregister.com

1 month ago
#bio 

Roger Ebert tells the one about his friend, the very caring Rockefeller. via the Bleader

3 months ago
#blow jobs for everyone! 

put this in your museum and smoke it

(Source: craigslistmirrors)

3 months ago with 149 notes
#mirror image 

October 15, 1982 - White House Press Briefing 

Q: Larry, does the President have any reaction to the announcement—the Centers for Disease Control in Atlanta, that AIDS is now an epidemic and have over 600 cases?
MR. SPEAKES: What’s AIDS?
Q: Over a third of them have died. It’s known as “gay plague.” (Laughter.) No, it is. I mean it’s a pretty serious thing that one in every three people that get this have died. And I wondered if the President is aware of it?
MR. SPEAKES: I don’t have it. Do you? (Laughter.)
Q: No, I don’t.
MR. SPEAKES: You didn’t answer my question.
Q: Well, I just wondered, does the President—
MR. SPEAKES: How do you know? (Laughter.)
Q: In other words, the White House looks on this as a great joke?
MR. SPEAKES: No, I don’t know anything about it, Lester.
Q: Does the President, does anybody in the White House know about this epidemic, Larry?
MR. SPEAKES: I don’t think so. I don’t think there’s been any—
Q: Nobody knows?
MR. SPEAKES: There has been no personal experience here, Lester.
Q: No, I mean, I thought you were keeping—
MR. SPEAKES: I checked thoroughly with Dr. Ruge this morning and he’s had no—(laughter)—no patients suffering from AIDS or whatever it is.
Q: The President doesn’t have gay plague, is that what you’re saying or what?
MR. SPEAKES: No, I didn’t say that.
Q: Didn’t say that?
MR. SPEAKES: I thought I heard you on the State Department over there. Why didn’t you stay there? (Laughter.)
Q: Because I love you, Larry, that’s why. (Laughter.)
MR. SPEAKES: Oh, I see. Just don’t put it in those terms, Lester. (Laughter.)
Q: Oh, I retract that.
MR. SPEAKES: I hope so.
Q: It’s too late.

woof

(Source: sexartandpolitics, via channingkennedy)

4 months ago with 646 notes
#Reagan AIDS 
Clinton/Christie < Cache/monet 

Clinton/Christie < Cache/monet 

5 months ago with 3 notes
#Cachemonet #microsoft gif #comp sci 

"Max had left a screensaver depicting 12 tabs of Scooby-Doo windowpane acid on one of my classroom computers. I told him to do a research paper on Timothy Leary and quit being such an asshole. I think that’s why he dosed me."

Oh my god this story is amazing.
6 months ago
#acid #field tripping 

And this is just the introduction…

"Ayo whattup…you now back in the presence of the one n only grand imperial Hands Of Zeus aka the illustrious Thor Molecules aka the mighty Cocaine Biceps…otherwise known as Shampoo Bracelets the panty melter…also known as the one n only Galaxy Knuckles or Broccoli Bundles the almighty… Yall might also kno me as ya boy Big Ghostaka Volcano Hands the inventor of slaps… Otherwise you might kno me as Phantom Raviolis or the grand immaculate Spartacus Deluxe. I kno what yall prolly thinkin…THIS N**GA DONE CAME UP…HE HOLLYWOOD…LOOK AT ALL THIS EXTRAVAGANTISM B…OH MY GAWD. I feel you my n**ga….I sense theres animosity n whatever whatever. I done started from the bottom n now Im here…straight up n down. I aint ashamed bout none of that. Im gettin this cake n Imma still be givin yall the raw uncut while I enjoy this luxurious splendor. Jus lemme flourish tho. Anyways yo….we aint here for all that so the gawd gon cut the introductions short so we can get this shit on n pippin.”

7 months ago
#big ghost #grand imperial hands of zeus #illustrious thor molecules #the mighty cocaine biceps #shampoo bracelets the panty melter #the one n only galaxy knuckles #broccoli bundles the almighty #volcano hands the inventor of slaps